Get That Ridgeback Off My Bed

Get that Ridgeback off my bed
He ate plastic, grease and bread

I let him call my house his turf
so now he lives to counter surf

He ate cat food and cat poo
He ate a book, a worm, a shoe

He just ignores my daily rants
He even ate my underpants!

And now he's curled up next to me
My eyes are moist, I cannot see

His whistling arse sets loose a smell
and I'm not feeling very well

His noxious wind wafts down the hall
Peeling paint right off the wall

I love that Ridgeback, as I said
But can you get him off my bed?

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